How I Changed My Life at 45 – And How You Can Too

I have always been able to change the path that I was on to something I wanted. I always had this ability to manifest whatever I wanted, I trusted the universe and myself to know it would become clear. But at the age of 45, I did something radical: I stepped away from the “career” I thought defined me. On the outside, it looked like I had it all together. On the inside, my emotions were running the show, sabotaging both my work and my personal life. I knew if I didn’t stop, refocus, and recraft my beliefs, I was heading toward a future I didn’t want.

I pressed pause. And in that space, I made a choice.

I trained as an NLP Practitioner—not just for me, but for the people around me. For my (then) husband. For the family I longed for. For everyone, like me, who wanted to show up more present and more whole for their loved ones. At that time, I was also facing the reality that time was running out to have the child I’d always yearned for. Suddenly, the excuses that had kept me stuck—career goals, external expectations, other people’s needs—didn’t feel so important anymore.

And here’s what I discovered: we all have the ability to live a bigger, more fulfilling life. We just need the courage to ask ourselves the right questions and the tools to guide us through change.

Why Hitting Rock Bottom Can Be Your Turning Point

But it was also a reminder: every downfall can make us greater. Every fall gives us the chance to rise stronger.

That year, I chose to rise. I chose to focus on personal growth, on healing, and on creating a life that was bigger than the one I’d been living.

How You Can Start Changing Your Life Too

I believe transformation begins with honest reflection. 

Here are some of the questions and exercises that helped me—and can help you too:

Step 1: What lights you up?

Write a list of 20 things you’re interested in.

Think back: what did you love as a child or teenager?

What could you talk about for hours?

If money weren’t an issue, what would you spend your days doing?

What projects would you take on if you knew you couldn’t fail?

Step 2: When are you in flow?

Recall times you’ve felt completely absorbed, joyful, or unstoppable.

What were you doing?

Who were you with?

What activities make you lose track of time?

Step 3: Find the patterns.

Look through your lists and highlight themes that repeat.

Is helping others a constant? Creativity? Movement? Teaching? Travel? Connection?

These patterns are clues to your authentic self.

Understanding Your Core Values

Values are the compass of your life. Often, the gap between what we truly value and what we actually do creates suffering. Ask yourself:

When was I happiest, and why?

When did I feel most fulfilled?

What makes me proud now?

What situations leave me drained or resentful?

By uncovering your core values, you start to see where life feels out of alignment—and where you can make changes.

Strengths & Weaknesses: Your Secret Roadmap

A strength isn’t just something you’re good at. It’s something that energises you. Signs of a strength include:

Success: You feel effective and capable when doing it.

Instinct: You look forward to it.

Growth: You feel focused and lose track of time while doing it.

Need: Even if you’re tired, you feel fulfilled afterwards.

Reflect:

I feel energised when…

I feel drained when…

What do others compliment me on most?

What do I do easily that others find hard?

Highlight these answers—you’ll discover your unique strengths, the tools you already carry to design your next chapter.

My Mantra Through It All:

“Every fall is just a chance to rise stronger.”

Final Thoughts:

At 45, I could have stayed stuck in a life that wasn’t working. Instead, I pressed pause, asked myself hard questions, and dared to change. Today, I’m not just surviving—I’m thriving. I’ve built a life that refects who I truly am, not who the world told me to be.

And you can too.

So grab a notebook. Ask yourself the questions above. Be brave enough to answer honestly. You already have the answers inside you—now it’s time to listen.

Call to Action: If this resonates with you, let’s connect. I share tools, practices, and inspiration to help women over 45 rewrite their story and live life on their terms.